China Sisters

On the last leg of our US trip, we visited friends in Chicago. Our dear friends from Gwen's adoption trip made a two and a half hour drive, each way, to spend some time with us there. Gwen and Kate hadn't seen each other for more than a year, but within minutes were acting like sisters. We've told the girls that the four of them who came from Yibin social welfare institute and were adopted at the same time, are "China sisters." We really want to keep this connection for them alive as they grow. It was such a treat to watch the girls interact, and to chat with Jen, Kate's mom.
We met at a park, where our Year of the Monkey girls were in their element! Kate and Gwen LOVED this part of the playground! After every turn of this wheel, they would jump down and beg to go again! Jen, Kate's mom, is pushing them around in this picture.

Monkey girls have to get as high as possible...
Sweet Kate!

We made a sign to let Kimberly know we wished she could have joined us... her momma really tried to make it happen, but it is tricky to travel from Florida to Illinois for just an afternoon. We missed you both, Carol and Kimberly!


The Monkey girls were busy with their antics up to the last few minutes before we got into our cars to part ways. The girls were pretty sad to leave each other. I lifted both Kate and Gwen up for a three-way hug with me while Jen got Kate's little brother into the car. Gwen wriggled away after a minute or two, but Kate put her head on my shoulder and gave me a good cuddle. I had a few cuddles like that from her back in December 2005, when we all first met our girls. It took me back to the hotel in Chengdu, Sichuan province, to have that sweet cuddle from Kate again! Thanks, darling girl. What a treat to see you thriving in your wonderful family. Thanks, Jen, for making the long drive. You are a real friend!

Beginning Again

This is the time of year when there is a real influx of new families moving to Shanghai, yet not many returning families are back from summer home visits. We remember being in this position last summer, when we went to church the first few Sundays we lived here. The pews were sparsely filled, and when the pastor asked new people to stand, it seemed that half the congregation was new.

Today we went to church on the look out for a new family. Scott "picked" one out for us, and we had dinner together at Johnny Moo's (a burger and shake place!) after the service. They have three girls, one exactly Madelyn's age, one younger, one older. They also joined us for coffee at our house afterwards, and we so enjoyed visiting with them. Madelyn and Caroline have already declared that they are best friends, and are planning future play times.

I miss old friends. And I'm so thankful for new friends. God is good.

Madelyn Faces

Go Jump In The River

Poconos 2008

My girl is poised to jump.What mother in her right mind lets her children jump into a river of questionable depth? Well, the tree was right there, and other kids were doing it...
... but after this move, I drew the line. No flips. No more. None.
Of course then Uncle Shann had to get in on the fun, with his stunt. Seth looked on approvingly.
...and then took a flying leap. I was quite relieved when this activity was over and we floated on our way downriver.

Home

We're home, and we're tired. Caleb was the first to be in bed, by about 5 o'clock. The other three followed, Madelyn curling up in her clothes on top of the covers, and Gwen falling asleep in the middle of a story. I forced myself to stay up, but after only a couple of hours of sleep on the plane, I am hoping to be in bed before 9 tonight.

It was an amazing month. We got to be with so many people that we love, a wonderful gift. We played on the beach, in the woods, in the river. We stayed up late talking. We had a lot of good food. We drove quite a few miles. As good as it all was, as we finished up our time in the US with a visit in Chicago last weekend, I began to long for home. Our China home.

The distictive China smell hit us in the face the moment we stepped off the plane. But unlike last July's first steps off the plane, this time the smell was familiar, if not homey. We looked at each other and grinned.

So here we are. Yes, the new curtains do look like a museum. It is very muggy and smoggy outside. We're back to a sea of black heads of hair and an unfamiliar language. But now it feels like home.

Multiple Loyalties

Today the kids and I went to visit dear friends in Medina, where we lived several moves ago. As we drove through the town, past several old haunts, we all felt nostalgic for our old hometown. Cries of "Oh, I remember this!", and "I loved that place!", punctuated our drive through the familiar streets. The conversation progressed to the kids discussing how they love all the green in America, how lush it seems everywhere, compared to the "concrete jungle" we live in in China, to use Caleb's words. They talked about wanting to live in the US again. Then Caleb wisely said, "But once we're back in China, with our friends, then we're going to be glad we're there."

As I've written in several previous posts, this month I too have reveled in the green, the blue, the familiar. It's great to be here. But I know my little part of China well enough now to have elements of it that I know I will long for, once we leave there for good someday.

I told the kids this afternoon that I think it's good to love more than one place.

Friends

One afternoon while we were at Sarah's, Gwen seemed to really connect with Juline. Sweet Juline cannot sit up because of the weight of her head, due to the hydrocephalus. Gwen lay down next to her on the bed and talked to her for a long while. This is not generally spitfire Gwen's normal mode of operation, so it was amazing to see. She reveled in Juline's responses. Later, when another foster mom picked Juline up to take her for the week while we were all in the Poconos, Gwen sobbed and sobbed that Juline was leaving. Not sure what that connection was, but it was something special.

Daddy's Gone, Daddy's Home

Scott is back in Shanghai. As I type this just before bed here in the US on Wednesday night, he is back at his office on Thursday morning, trying to jump into the work that awaits him.

While were in the US, the curtains and screens were installed in our place. Scott said the curtains look extremely formal, like a bank or a museum. Hmmm... can't wait to see what they look like. The phone and internet lines were put in also, so Scott will sort out hooking those up before we get back.

The kids and I have five or six more days in the US before we head back. I am excited about spending time with the people we have yet to see, and glad to have more time to soak in all the things I love here, but with Scott back in China, I'm feeling a little antsy. Maybe it's good that he went back a week ahead of us, because it will make it easier for me to leave here.

Youngest Nieces in Black & White

Alyssa Jane, two and a half years old

EmmaClare, almost two years old

At the Lake

I grew up within a couple of miles of Lake Erie. We swam at the beach and grilled kielbasi and ate potato salad at the park above it. We vacationed at a lake community of cottages on Lake Erie several summers. When Scott and I were dating, we enjoyed sunsets sitting on the pier, dreaming about our future. Several times we made breakfast together at the beach. Caleb took some of his first unsteady steps along a Lake Erie beach. I've walked with my sweet grandma, who is now nearly 100, along these shores.

This week I've returned to these beaches. Lake Erie may have had a bad rap in the past, but the last two evenings by this body of water in the Midwest have been lovely. The peachy pink sky reflecting in the water... well, a Shanghai sunset just isn't anything like that. My girls paddled around in the lake tonight in lovely, warm, clear water.

I guess we always see places we love through rose colored glasses. Or maybe that was just the color of the clouds as the sun was setting...

Catching the Big One

Poconos 2008

I'm loving the chance for my boys to be boys this week... something about the woods and the river that seems to bring out those basic instincts, reminds them of things about themselves that may have been in hibernation for a while.

Up In The Green

This week I am loving green. And blue. And blue and green. And the river and the trees and the mountains. I'm trying to soak it all in, to save it for when we're back in the big city.

We're in the Pocono mountains this week with my family. We're floating down the river, diving for golf balls, watching skunks and racoons at night, and catching fireflies. We're fishing, splashing, and lazing on the water. We're golfing, toasting marshmallows, hiking to waterfalls. We're talking into the night. We have muddy feet. We're reading (The Shack- if you haven't gotten a copy yet, do.), having cousin squabbles, and blowing bubbles.

It's great to be together. Have I said that already? :-)

Sunset Girls

Girls in the Surf

Watching Meredyth and Madelyn in the waves in North Carolina last week brought back memories for me of the wonderful fun I had in the ocean with my cousin Tamara when I was growing up. I know you remember it too, Tam. Let's do it again someday!

Thursday Night

Loving being at my sister's home here in Pennsylvania this week... driving on the hilly, winding roads past old stone farmhouses and through densely wooded areas; loving the deep blue sky we enjoyed tonight as we ate dinner out on the patio; loving the fresh air... it smelled so good tonight, I couldn't put my finger on what it was, but it was a clean smell. Loving going to Wal-mart and browsing. Loving hanging with Sarah and her kiddos, including sweet Juline, whom Sarah and Shann are caring for this summer while she recovers from surgery to correct her hydrocephalus, before returning to her parents in Haiti. Loving watching our kids interact. Loving working in the kitchen with Sarah, doing dishes with her and talking together while meals are prepared. Loving working in Sarah's yard a little, clipping a branch here, pulling a weed there. I've missed that. Loving fast internet. Loving (gulp!) a little reality TV.

Loving being in America. And thinking of China.

Horsing Around

Seth follows Uncle Justin willingly...
Only to have him turn on him... He is snatched up...

And carried out to sea!

Group Photo

Trying to get in position...
Finally together!

Wednesday

It's so good to be in the US.

We enjoyed several days at our dear friends' home in North Carolina right after we left the beach... time with this clan is never long enough. After leaving there yesterday morning, we arrived at my sister's home in Pennsylvania by dinner time. "Welcome Cousins!" was spelled out on the front sidewalk in colored chalk. Looking forward to spending the next few days here.

It seems like too much almost, to get to be with so many people that I love at once... I wish that somehow I could spread these visits out, to maybe have one each month. Since it's all packed in to this one month, I need to soak it in and store it all away for later, when I can enjoy the memories.

Purse Contents

As I scrounged through my purse this afternoon, I found a mixture of China and the US.

-Currency, of course. Both RMB and USD are in my wallet.
-A receipt from the beach shop earlier this week.
-A slip of paper with the address of a friend in Jinqiao, on MingYue Lu.
-Chewing gum purchased at the Food Lion here on the island.
-A ticket stub from a show Maribel and I took the girls to at the Pearl Tower Theater the week before we both left for the US.
-the non-resident card library card I got to use the computer here in NC.
-the list of ideas for a home school co-op I made at our last meeting in June.
-our membership cards for the pool by our new place in Jinqiao.

It's all mixed together in my purse... and that seems just fine. Pieces of both worlds.

Down By The Sea

I'm sitting in the small public library of a little beach town in North Carolina. We're here this week with Scott's family, enjoying beach and cousin time. We're watching a large tub of crabs and sand on the deck, caught by Caleb this afternoon; we're body surfing, we're enjoying great food cooked by a different couple every night. We're sweeping sand off the floor many times a day, applying sunscreen to each other's backs, doing Pilates together at 11 p.m., and making sausage and french toast for an hour in the morning. We have novels and magazines in random places all over the house, towels and bathing suits on the clothsline and hanging over the deck railing, and laundry going around the clock. We're watching movies curled up on Pa and Nanny's bed, making sand castles decorated with shells, and digging deep holes on the beach for the rising tide to fill. We're playing bocce, frisbee, and baseball on the beach. We're talking and laughing and singing the same songs over and over. We're going through cases of bottled water. We're hanging out in bathing suits all day.

It's great to be together.

Nearly There

We're almost there. We've done the big jump across the pond, and now we're just waiting for our little hop from Chicago to Cleveland. I am loving the fast internet in the Admirals Club... I can't believe how quickly I can navigate! There is blue sky scattered with puffy clouds outside the window here... ahhh. This is what I was waiting for. :-) But the good stuff, the faces of our family... well, we're nearly there.

June 22, 1991- June 22, 2008

It might not be profound, but after seventeen years of walking through life together, this song says how I feel. Happy Anniversary, Scott... you're still the only one for me.

You're Still The One

When I first saw you, I saw love.
And the first time you touched me, I felt love.
And after all this time, you're still the one I love.

Looks like we made it
Look how far we've come my baby
We mighta took the long way
We knew we'd get there someday
They said, "I bet they'll never make it"
But just look at us holding on
We're still together still going strong

(You're still the one)
You're still the one I run to
The one that I belong to
You're still the one I want for life
(You're still the one)
You're still the one that I love
The only one I dream of
You're still the one I kiss good night

Ain't nothin' better
We beat the odds together
I'm glad we didn't listen
Look at what we would be missin'
They said, "I bet they'll never make it"
But just look at us holding on
We're still together still going strong

(You're still the one)
You're still the one I run to
The one that I belong to
You're still the one I want for life
(You're still the one)
You're still the one that I love
The only one I dream of
You're still the one I kiss good night
(You're still the one)
You're still the one I run to
The one that I belong to
You're still the one I want for life

(You're still the one)
You're still the one that I love
The only one I dream of
You're still the one I kiss good night
I'm so glad we've made it
Look how far we've come, my baby.

By Shania Twain

Saturday Night Thoughts From Shanghai

For all intents and purposes we are finally unpacked from the move. I use the word "we" loosely, as it was mostly me that did the unpacking, with a little help here and there. That's fine with me, really, since I like to be the one to put things in the places that I choose.

We are still waiting for a table and chairs to be delivered~ rental housing in Shanghai generally comes furnished, and as this place is new we are still waiting for some of the furnishings to arrive. We are also still waiting for window treatments. We have nothing on any window in the house, save for the light blocking plastic we have taped over the windows in our bedroom for a little privacy. We're hoping drapes will come this week... the landlord did allow me to choose the textiles, although the style of the curtains is up to her, so I'm anxious to see what we end up with!

In the mean time we've stood at the kitchen island or sat around our card table for meals, which happens to also be doubling as a computer desk right now because we don't have wiring for phone or internet yet and so we are having to use a wireless card, which works only next to the window due to the thick marble construction of this place. I am rambling here, I know. But the challenges of living without any real internet connection to speak of, along with no cell phone reception in the house and no land line phone have made me a little frustrated this week. I have pictures I want to post, but I can't seem to get them to you.

At Christmas I was SO anxious to get to the US because of the bad Christmas decorating in Shanghai. It just wasn't the same here, no matter how western they tried to be. Now that our summer US trip is upon us, I am looking forward to fast internet. That and blue sky. Not just the occasional peek through the clouds we get here, but real Carolina blue sky. Ahhh.

Funny. In my last post I was willing my children to soak up China. I still want them to. I do. I can honestly say that I love Shanghai. It's in my blood now. But as much as it's home, it's not my real home. The spiritual parallels are all over this, aren't they? :-)

My dearest friend here is leaving on Thursday, the same day we are leaving. But she isn't coming back for the next school year. We had all hoped the Hillmer family would have a second year here, but for some reason they had only one. Because we are leaving for our summer US trip at the same time they are leaving Shanghai permanently, I don't think the reality of the loss will really hit me until we return in August. I haven't been the one Left Behind for a while, although I have been left before, a number of times. Long ago Bill and Rebecca left us, just days before Caleb was born; Sara and Steve left us for NYC a few years later, and not quite as long ago Kris left me for Texas... being the one left is harder than being the one leaving. The one leaving has something new to go to, an adventure, a new life. The one left behind has only what they already had to continue in, but now missing someone important. Both leaving and being left provide opportunities for new friendships to develop... I know this. I have left others behind in various moves. I'm ready for new friendships in the fall. The great thing is that true friends are never lost...

Sponges, I Hope

As we were all riding our bikes through the streets of a local area yesterday, I found myself silently willing first Gwen, then all the children, to "soak up China." I often wonder how much of this whole China experience each of them will carry with them through their lives... I hope they are absorbing much that will become a part of who they are.

Our "Bank''

I am posting from Maribel's house, as it seems with the current internet situation at our place, pictures aren't making their way through. So, here's our new place, the first floor of this "bank"... I know it's a little cold looking from the outside, but we are very glad to be here. More pictures the inside as soon as everything is put away!

Our New House

I am really trying to post a picture of our new place... but our internet issues here have been challenging.

In the mean time, we are settling in. The work of moving always surprises me... don't I remember what it's like to have to find new homes for six people's stuff?! We actually have most things put away now, a week later, save for a few boxes of books that we have no shelf space for, and some random items that I need to get creative to find homes for.

The boys loved their extra hour of sleep before school this week with our close proximity to Concordia... the entrance to our compound is directly across the street from the entrance to the school. School ended yesterday, so it was only four days of this bliss, but we will all enjoy it in the fall. The girls have found friends in the neigborhood, and I have enjoyed chatting with other Concordia moms who live just houses away from us. Scott's commute is longer by a bit... he is experimenting with an earlier start time to help avoid some traffic. Church is around the corner, we walked there in five minutes last Sunday.

I've told a few people that living here in the Jinqiao area of Shanghai is kind of like small town America... why did we have to come to China to find it?!

Honesty

Gwen, about M&Ms...

"Can I have the muchest more?"

New Link

I've just added a new link in my sidebar, The Gift of Change. My friend Tracy is setting off on an adventure with her family, moving to the opposite side of the country, in just a few days. God has blessed her with amazing perspective as she processes this life change... Tracy has wonderful insight on many things in every day life, and now even more so. I told her recently that I need to talk to her frequently so she can help me interpret my life! I think you will enjoy her thoughts.

Moving Day

We're moving today. The girls have just stripped their beds and are taking all the posters and pictures off the wall next to Madelyn's bed. This move isn't nearly as big a deal as last summer's, but I still have been trying to purge and sort and give away. Amazing how quickly "stuff" accumulates... didn't I just do this?! We are moving to the first floor of a three story house, with an apartment on each floor. It is in a compound directly across the street from the boys' school, and around the corner from our church. We are really looking forward to being more a part of the community by being there, but it's not without some sadness that we leave our apartment in the sky, with the amazing river view, the boats, the city lights... it's been a wonderful place to spend our first year in Shanghai.

With Grandpa by the Water

Alyssa and my dad by the shore of Lake Erie. Don't you love it?

Images of Hope House

Hope House was founded about five years ago by a couple who decided they wanted to make a difference for orphans in China. They took their life savings to open this place where abandoned babies with medical needs can have the surgeries they need arranged for and receive the follow up care required.

I took nearly 100 pictures at Hope House on Saturday and Sunday. Here are a few...


This is Stacia, one of the younger girls that came along on the trip with us. I took this just as we were leaving on Sunday. Stacia peeked back into one of the rooms from outside, and these two cute faces scrambled to see her.

A sleeping angel...
These twin girls are about 7 months old. Most all of the children at Hope House are there because of a special medical need that their original orphanage was unable to handle. These twins are perfectly healthy, but were sent to Hope House because they were premature. Here they are with their nanny, but we all enjoyed cuddling them.
Hope House is a beautiful facility. Clean wood floors, lots of light, handmade quilts on the beds, very low ratio of babies to caregivers. Quite a contrast from the social welfare institute where Gwen lived. I expected to feel so happy for the children that live a Hope, and indeed it is a wonderful, caring environment. But in the end, it just looks nice. The children are still orphans, no matter how nice their surroundings. The great thing about Hope is that nearly all of the children there will eventually be placed in families. But for now, they wait.

Pictured on the wall are small framed photos of the children who have lived or currently live at Hope House.
A nanny reaches down to feed a waiting mouth in the baby room.
Toddlers being fed in the lunchroom.
This photo of me with these two little guys shows the Hope House facility in the background.

Jennifer, one of the gals in our group, cuddles a sweetie.

We really enjoyed taking a small group of little ones out to the playground (playgrounds are unheard of at many Chinese orphanages... Gwen's had only an empty cement courtyard for outdoor play). I think we may have had more fun than they did! Here Sue gives this cutie a push. The large framed picture tells the story of a man who encounters a small boy on the beach, throwing starfish stranded on the sand back into the surf. As the man surveyed the expanse of sand covered with hundreds of starfish, he asked the boy why he was even bothering when there was no way he could save them all. "I know I can't", the boy answered as he tossed the one he was holding out into the water. "But I've made all the difference to this one."

So it is with orphan care.

Me with one of the twins. Don't you just want to kiss those cheeks?!

I loved how this bath area had a baby's picture next to each wash cloth, and a cup and toothbrush for each one.
Some of our group interacting with the babies, while the nannies look on.
I loved this little guy's sweet face! Strollers waiting for riders and pushers!

Books For Babies

Check out the results of our scrapbooking weekend at the orphanage in Beijing. We completed 44 books! We stayed in the orphanage, Hope Healing Home, in an apartment on the second floor. We were able to go play with the babies, hold them, take them outside, etc. It was an amazing experience... I have lots of photos and more to say about it all, but will have to save all that for another post.

This photo is our group, right before we left, with all the books we completed. Several of the books we finished are for little ones who are going to be placed with their forever families in the next month or so! Here are a few of the beautiful children at Hope Healing Home for whom we created photo books.