Figuring Things Out

Gwen has recently been making a few connections about her heritage and about being adopted.


We have a number of adoption themed story books, and she has been requesting them frequently, and seems to identify with the adopted girls in the stories. On several occassions she has asked me if the girl in the story is her.


A couple of weeks ago we were out in a very busy area, lots of Chinese people everywhere. She must have overheard something we said, and was repeating "Chinese, Chinese, Chinese" to herself. I asked her, "Who is Chinese?" She pointed to someone and said, "That guy." I asked her who else was, and she pointed out another person. Then I asked her if she was Chinese, and she said no. I told her that, yes, she is Chinese, and did she remember that Daddy and I came to get her in China? She nodded affirmatively, and then said, "And you're Chinese?"

So we're not quite there, but I think she's starting to understand a little. It's been a long time coming for her, I don't think she has even realized that she looks different from us. Caleb told her recently that her eyes were different from his, and about 30 minutes later she decided that fact was something to cry about. She said she thought he was laughing at her, which really wasn't the case. I'm glad we're surrounded by so many Chinese faces... she is the one who matches the majority. She just happens to be in a family that doesn't, so as a result she stands out anyway.

*********
The girls and I were in Ji-An Park last week, a lovely downtown park that I visitied several times last spring, on my own and also with the boys when we were here on our fact-finding trips. It is filled with retired people in the morning, people are in all the paths and walkways doing all types of dancing and exercises together. It's really a facsinating place. The girls and I enjoyed part of an hour there, it was their first time and they loved to watch all the activity. Of course they were being watched too... they had matching shirts on which made the three of us even more conspicuous than we already were. At one point Gwen said to me, "When we walk by those guys, why they all point at me?" Alas, this is to be her fate. The wonderful thing is, I know that God has equipped her with the strength to handle this issue. I look forward to seeing how her understanding grows and her self confidence grows to match it.