Preschool

I just got a call this morning that a space has opened up in a Mandarin immersion preschool that I had put Gwen on the waiting list for late last spring. There is a parent and child orientation this Friday morning, and school starts Monday.

Whoa.

None of my other children have attended preschool. I love preschool, in fact I directed and taught a church preschool program for the year before Caleb was born. I still have my lesson plan book from that year, tucked safely away in my files. But I didn't send Caleb, or Seth, or Madelyn. We were busy at home, learning together, and that seemed good.

Then there is Gwen. She is a full four years plus younger than Madelyn, which has made homeschooling Madelyn a challenge. I know so many people successfully homeschool a myriad of ages of children at the same time, while also keeping several toddlers busy. But I struggled with this last year. The girls had lots of fun together when we weren't schooling, but when we were, I felt like I didn't do a good job of being a kind and happy mommy and providing a good learning environment. I was frustrated often.

So I considered preschool for Gwen for this year. Madelyn and I need to buckle down and work hard on some things together this year, and I thought that maybe Gwen would do well in a different environment with lots of activities to keep her busy self engaged. Add in the immersion Mandarin... well, it may be frustrating at first, but what an opportunity for her.

But now that she's in, I'm second guessing myself. It is a lot of hours away from home. I've never done this with a preschooler before. Will it be too much for her? Will she and Madelyn miss their time together? Am I doing what's easy over what is best? I didn't expect this call so soon. I thought I had more time to consider it and prepare us all mentally.

Lord, calm my anxious heart.