Cuddle My Baby

Well, I guess it's been apparent that I don't have as much time to write as I did in China, where I had no household responsibilities and only one child! Things are a little different now that we're home and trying to get into a routine of sorts. For the most part, Gwen is the star of the show and everyone in our family wants to hold her or play with her. I love that our other kids are enjoying her so much, because having a new toddler in the house isn't the easiest thing to adjust to! Her presence, though she is adored by all and wanted like crazy, causes everyone to need to be less selfish and more willing to wait for time and attention, including me! That's a good thing for everyone. One of my prayers was that having Gwen would stretch all of us.

As for the cuddling, one of the times that I've enjoyed the most is when I give Gwen a little snack, like dry cereal, in the late afternoon, and we sit down with it together on the rug in front of the kitchen sink. Often she will sit on my lap, but a couple of days ago, she sat on the rug next to me and scooted up real close against my arm and laid her head against it. She remained like that for a minute or two. It was so sweet... at times like that I can't help but wonder what's going on in her head. Is the situation at all familiar to her? Had anyone ever sat on the floor with her and shared a snack? Had she leaned her head on the arm of one of the orphanage care givers? I hope so. I hope she has felt that connection, that closeness before in her little life.

Another cuddle time has been when we sing to her before we put her in her crib for naps or bedtime. Once the story is read and the blinds are closed, she knows what's coming and lays her head on my shoulder (or Scott's, if he's putting her to bed) even before the song starts. She, who is not often still and quiet, rests her head silently there through as many songs as we can muster, usually only two or three because we're tired too! When the songs are over and we lay her down, she doesn't protest for more... she seems pleased with what she has just heard, and it's enough. Again I wonder... was she ever held at bedtime and sung to? Well, she is now, and that's what she'll remember.

So now she knows about cuddling. She knows enough that she can give cuddles out to others, to us and to her little soft friends. We were so excited to see her do this with a teddy bear, just a week or so after we got back home from China with her. It seems like a very healthy sign to me, to see her snuggle a doll to her shoulder and hug it. She's learning how to love.